Morning Update
I woke up not so with it this morning. I think this was partly hangover from my friend Fudge’s surprise party in B-More last night, partly having to drive home listening to my friend Marc call his friends from Queens and let them know he was SHHHWASTED 5 times, partly due to having my bladder burst waiting for my brother at the train station at 2 AM (which did lead to a lovely conversation concerning his view on giving and receiving hickeys) and partly due to the work of one of my cats, Ferd.
Ferd is a master of waking up humans at 5 in the morning when he’s ready to be fed. Last night was one of his finer works. He climbed the ladder to my bed, “meowing” alerting me to his arrival. He pawed at my face until I was wide awake, but being the master of psychology that I am, I know if I was just ignored him he won’t be reinforced and he’ll eventually leave. I turned over on my side, with my back to him. He pawed at the back of my head for a little while longer, even slipping in his patented ear bite. I heard him retreat down the ladder and momentarily assumed he had given up. But as I said, Ferd is a master of his craft and he had just begun to fight. He began bashing the metal venitian blinds at the window. The scraping noise is unbearable so I quickly leaned over and raised the blinds up and out of his reach. But I’ve revealed my hand, I am most definitely awake. He pounces (figuratively and literally) on this opportunity and with a new sense of accomplishment resumes accosting me in my bed.
I just got back from my own personal Transporter movie sequel, except instead of a tricked out car I drove a banged up Kia minivan, (My dad tore up the passenger side of the car hitting a pole driving out of an Arbys’ parking lot while enjoying loaded potato bites. The whole thing was somewhat Homer Simpson-esque), a sidekick who’s wearing a stupid snow hat, and sweatpants, Jesse, and our cargo was not money for the mob but rather the most dangerous package of all…Nanny.
The trip went without too much trouble. We got her wheelchair stuck in snow a couple of times but no problems we couldn’t use our charm and cunning to get out of. The personal highlight for me came when upon our arrival Nanny requested change. She gives out gifts in intervals of Chai (18 for my non-jewish readers), so armed with $200 in 20s she presented a list of “5 $20s, 5 $10s, 6 $5s, 15 $1s” it was very much reminiscent to the start of a game of Monopoly. I couldn’t help out. My wallet contained a 5 spot and a painful reminder I saw Yes Man in the form of a ticket stub. However I did score this baby from her wall.
As a closing thought check out what Pops whipped up last night:
It’s a testament to just how much free time the man has, while at the same time showing how much we all care about a collection of players who could care less about us.
